


Whoops, There Goes My Dirty Little Secret

by Notthatnaturaldean



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Coming Out, Divorce, F/M, First Kiss, Homophobia, Love Confessions, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pining, Post-Canon Fix-It, Stan is still dead sorry guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2020-11-08 02:29:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20827904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notthatnaturaldean/pseuds/Notthatnaturaldean
Summary: After the Losers kill It and escape the Neilbolt House, they have to pick up where they left off and deal with their adult problems. These included a few relieved adults and an angry wife for a certain Loser, except for Richie. Richie just wishes that he could stop staring at Eddie all the damn time.





	1. Unwelcome Suprises

**Author's Note:**

> sorry it took so long, it's legit been like a year but i figure that if im stuck in quarantine might as well actually do smthn 
> 
> thanks for sticking with me and my writing to help me cope after that ending bc FUCK that ending it hurt so much jfc

Six adults stumble through the hotel entrance, making a beeline for the lobby. There's no staff at the front desk, but Richie can't decide if anyone works there or not, because he hasn't seen anyone besides them there since he checked in that first night. He and Eddie collapse onto the bar stools, and the others pile together onto the hideous beige sofa. None of them talk -- they're too overwhelmed. There's a shift in the air, something that they can't place, but even with this change they're wary, like they're expecting It to pop up at any time. Richie just stares at the black surface of the table, glancing anxiously up at Eddie's face occasionally. He can't quite believe that Eddie is actually there, alive and, well, none of them are ok but he's breathing and that's what matters. 

Richie only really remembers parts of what happened in the sewers after the ritual flopped. He vaguely remembers being caught in the deadlights -- his vision was blurry and flashy like the atmosphere of a club, images whizzing through his mind like pictures on those spinning wheels when movies were first made. Stanley draped over the side of a pristine white bathtub; Beverly lying on the floor in a pile of blood, the shadow of a man ("her husband," his mind supplied) looming over her; Eddie leaning over himself in the sewer, grinning like a mad man and talking a mile a minute, and then -- blood pouring from his mouth, splattering on Richie's glasses, impaled over him on one of It's claw. Richie doesn't remember yanking Eddie down and rolling away from It's claw, but he did. And because of that, Eddie was safe. He only remembers the relief and shock of watching those visions in the deadlights, shaking as the images became a false reality.

They had all trudged back to the hotel in silence, and here Richie finally feels some of his fear slip away. As soon as they sit down, a woman rushes down the stars -- or tries to. She's so large that the stairs creak, and Richie feels some pity for them. She's in a red dress, her light hair is pulled into a clumsy ponytail, and before any of them realize what's going on, she darts over and crushes Eddie into a bear hug.

"Eddie-bear!" she wails. "How could you leave me? I was so worried, you coul've gotten sick! I take care of you, how could you do this to me? You're never leaving my side ever again! Oh-my-" she steps back just enough to take in Eddie's tattered, dirt-covered clothes and gasps. His body is littered in bruises, and the dirty gauze is slipping off of the knife wound in his cheek. 

"His wife," Richie thinks bitterly, and looks away. He shouldn't be angry; she's worried about her husband and that's perfectly normal and Eddie was probably guilty about coming back to Derry without her. His hands still curl into fists under the bar. The others on the couch had sat up straight when Eddie's wife had come in, still anxious and jumpy. She's still sobbing when she grabs Eddie's hand and starts to drag him towards the door.

"You're going straight to the hospital, I can't even imagine how sick you could be right now, it looks like you've been running through the sewers or something. Just let me take care of you, Eddie, and we can just forget about about-"

"No." Eddie yanks his hand from hers and stops. Her eyes widen in surprise, and her bottom lip starts to tremble, threatening another stream of tears. 

"Eddi-"

"No, Marty," he says softly, trying to lessen the blow with her pet name. "I'm not going to the hospital, I'm not sick." Her lip stopped trembling, and Richie felt the air aound them thicken with dread. 

"Eddie," she said sternly, sounding exactly like the late Mrs. K. when she wouldn't let Eddie play with them during that summer in '85. Eddie looked down guiltily, but his voice was stable. 

"I'm not going, Marty." All of them covered their ears as Myra shrieked, expect for Eddie, who was used to the sound of her tantrums. 

"Why, Eddie-bear?" she sobbed, clutching his forearm like a drowning man to a lifeboat. "You can't leave -- who's going to take care of you? You're sick Eddie! You're delicate! You need me!" He tried to gently pull her off of himself, struggling as she tightened her grip. 

"I'm not delicate," he declared, freeing himself from her grip. He took a step back, and Richie stood up. He didn't even think beofre he muttered, "He doesn't need you." 

Beverly gasped quietly, and all the Losers' heads snapped towards Richie. Myra's mouth fell open, and Richie's face started burning. She barreled towards him and jabbed a pudgy finger in his chest. 

"And who -" jab. "exactly -" jab. "are you?"

"Trashmouth Tozier, at your service." He did a half-bow, sarcastically grinning up at her. He instantly knew it was a mistake, but it's not like that had stopped him before. Her nostrils flared like a rhino's, and she asked him snobbily, "LIke that horrible comedian? Rick Toads or something?" 

Richie winked at her, and Eddie rolled his eyes, even with the tension as thick as fog. Myra leveled what seemed to be her millionth glare at Richie in the span of a few seconds. 

"You're that awful comedian my Eddie-bear watches. I mean -- insults. My husband would never watch someone as disgusting as you."

Richie raised his eyebrows, and Bill and Mike snickered in the corner.

"He might have stupid, immature jokes, but he's my friend, Marty." Eddie slowly approached her, hands held up defensively. Myra, instead of crying yet agian, looked towards Eddie with pure contempt.

"Eddie, you are sick; he's the cause. I can fix you, but you can't delude yourself anymore."

"What exactly am I the cause of?"/"No, he isn't," they spoke at the same time.

"Besides being the cause of your mom's sex life, Eds," Richie finished, a shit-eating grin on his face. Mike and Ben groaned, and Eddie sighed. 

"Beep beep, Richie." Richie's grin faded when Myra started up again.

"Eddie, enough! We are leaving, and when we get home we can fix all of this, without this...man." She turned on her heel and walked towards the door, but stopped when she realized that Eddie was in the same place.

"No."

"Don't you love me?" she asked sharply, shocked and unsure; she was used to him meekly following her orders.

"No. No, I don't."

She opened her mouth, but he held up a finger to silence her, and she gaped like a fish.

"I don't love you, you just reminded me of my mother. You were comfortable. But I never loved you. And it's not a condition, and I'm not delicate -- I'm just fucking gay and my mother deluded me. We're getting a divorce, and I'm leaving."

Now it was Richie's turn to gape at Eddie. "He's gay! He likes dudes! I have a chance!" his mind screamed. "Even if he's gay, he's not gonna fall for someone like you, dumbass," the darker part of his mind sneered. He ignored both sides in favor of stuttering, "Wh..What?!" as Beverly and Mike whooped in the corner.

"You guys knew," Richie accused, pointing at them. Bill shrugged and Beverly replied, "I mean, kinda. Did you see the looks he gave you as kids?"

Eddie stammered as he denied Bev's remark, looking between Richie and Myra like a trapped animal. Myra looked as if she'd been slapped across the face; Richie was bright read and looked as if he'd died and gone to heaven.

"I can't believe you, Eddie," Myra said quietly. "I cant believe," she got louder. "That after all these years, you'd leave me to run of with some...some, PERVERT!"

The only sound breaking the silence was her panting, and Eddie's face contorted in an ugly grimace at the word "pervert". Richie had only seen such a cruel look on Eddie's face once: when they finally cornered It just an hour or two ago.

"Get out," he snapped, sharp and cold.

"But-" Myra finally cowered, pleading, holding her hands as if praying to some unknown force.

"Get out!"

She bolted from the hotel, banging the screen door in her rage. Eddie's shoulders slumped as she fled, and he suddenly seemed his age. Richie let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding in, and tentatively glanced over at Eddie.

"You good, Eds?" He rambed on, unsure of what to do to comfort Eddie, and too scared to get closer to him. "I mean, clearly you aren't, you basically just got yelled at by your mom again. She seems worse than ol' Mrs. K. though -- Mrs. K. never called me a toad. I don't think anyone has, actually -- that was a new one, I'm gonna have to use -"

"Richie."

"Yeah?" he said, trying to sound casual, and missing by a mile when his voice cracked. "Oh my god, I'm going through puberty again," thought Richie. "My voice is cracking and I don't know how to deal with a crush and I still don't know when to stop fucking talking, he's gonna hate me she's still his wife and -"

"Don't call me Eds."

Richie visibly relaxed, and let out a little chuckle. "You know you love it, Eds," he said, pinching the younger man's cheek.

"Ge'off, you dumbass," Eddie grumbled, swatting Richie's hand away. Bill coughed pointedly, and they both looked down, embarassed. Eddie's cheeks where Richie had pinched him was slightly pink, and he looked like a complete mess, since none of them had washed up or anything after their fight in the sewers.

Richie couldn't stop staring. Suddenly, he chewed his bottom lip in thought, and smiled. "Hey guys, I've got an idea."


	2. Well, Maybe a Little-Welcoming Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Eddie finally musters up the courage to stand up to Myra, he and Richie still have some unfinished business to discuss. And what better place to confess to your life-long just recently remembered crush from childhood than in a cold lake surrounded by your annoying-ass friends? Richie assumes that Eddie will either run or yell when he confesses - and he does. Just not in a way that Richie expects.

Gravel crunched under the tires of a dirty, black car as it pulled up close to the railing near the edge of the road. This was a common stop, seeing as there were tire tracks and trampled grass around them, showing how teens still snuck under the fence during the day, opting to ignore the fading "PRIVATE PROPERTY KEEP O-" sign half-hazardly nailed to the fence and instead sneaking alcohol, partying, and wreaking general teen havoc like the generations before them. 

Richie was the first out of the car, and Eddie and Beverly fell out after him, eager to get out of the very small back seat. Mike and Bill hopped out as Beverly let Ben out of the trunk, and internally he was very grateful to have suggested fitting in the trunk. That back seat couldn't have been comfortable for any of them, with Richie's long legs and the awkward tension coming off between him and Eddie. 

Ever since Eddie's wife ran from the hotel, they were locked in a staring contest. Richie would stare at Eddie, and the minute Eddie turned to look at him, Richie's eyes would dart away. Then he would look back and Eddie would suddenly find the carpet super interesting. The other Losers were silent, too uncomfortable and nervous to break the tension between them. Richie was oddly silent the entire ride, only talking loud enough to give Bill directions, but once he started they all knew where they were headed. The lake. Where they had spent their summers laughing, swimming, and able to forget the horrors of their childhood for a little bit

. None of them were sure why they were there, but they didn't question Richie. Once they headed out of the car, Richie became his loud, arrogant self almost immediately.

"Last one there's a rotten old dick!" 

Eddie rolled his eyes and Mike shook his head, but they all at once smiled and started racing toward the edge of the cliff, dirty clothes and sore limbs forgotten. Ben easily got to the edge first, with Richie almost running into his back.

"Woah," Richie shouted, bumping into Ben's back and almost sending them both tumbling down into the murky green water below. Mike and the rest scurried over, laughing breathlessly and staring at Richie. 

"Why're we here, Trashmouth?" asked Ben, looking over the edge. Richie smiled, clapping his hands together. 

"We're here, of course, to-" 

"Hell no, dude," Eddie interrupted, marching over to the edge of the cliff to stare down Richie, hands on his hips. 

"I'm not jumping in that lake with all these cuts and bruises, I'll get an infection and I could lose an arm to -" 

Richie pushed him forward, but Eddie yanked his yellow sleeve and they fell down into the lake together as the other Losers watched, amused and not at all shocked at the display. Bev walked forward and paused at the edge. 

"Guess the girl is still gonna out-do you Losers!" she screamed, laughing as she hit the water with a smack. Mike winced, and the three men at the roadside looked at each other, shrugged, and all barreled down to the water, splashing and screaming at the top of their lungs. They all swam around, laughing and smacking water at each other.

Mike and Bill got into a water fight, and eventually Bev ended up on Ben's shoulders to splash Eddie, who was screaming and trying to walk around the shallow water and instead stomping and tripping face-first into the murky shallows. Richie didn't know how long they had all been splashing around for, carefree and happy to forget their experience in the sewers for a little while at least. But once the water fights calmed down and everyone had starting sitting around the sandbar making small talk about old topics, Richie decided that it was time for him to talk to Eddie.

Well, at least to confess, but he was like 87% sure that Eddie was gonna either scream and run or try to down him once Richie told him. He supposed that Eddie would have the right to do any of those. 'Cause c'mon, just because the guy came out to his wife, which is scary enough as is, it's not like Richie should expect him to love him back after all this time just because suddenly Richie knew that Eddie liked dick as much as he did apparently. 

But, he reasoned, I told myself if we got out of that hell-hole alive that I was gonna tell him, and I don't think there's a God up there, but just in case he tries to fuck with me, I'm gonna man up and tell Eddie. He was trying to reason with himself that there wasn't a reason to be nervous, that it was just Eds, that Eddie was gay and wouldn't hate him for it, Richie was still shaking with anxiety coursing through his body as he slowly swam near Eddie. 

Eddie was near Bev and Ben, who were super energetic about the conversation about Ben's new promotion and how he was doing so well for himself in the future. They were so focused on each other that Bev was gesturing as Richie swam by and smacked Richie in the face, his glasses sinking to the bottom of the sand immediately. 

"Oh god, I'm sorry Rich I didn't mean to!" she gasped, a hand covering her mouth. He laughed, and both Bev and Ben swam under to grab Richie's glasses.

He could care less about his glasses currently, though, and swam over to Eddie, who was laughing at the whole situation. 

"Gotta say Trashmouth, you look better without your glasses, you've got the whole angry grampa vibe with your squinty eyes." 

Richie furrowed his brows. "Yeah, well you look better without 'em too." 

He knew it was childish, but he stuck out his tongue. Eddie stuck his tongue out at him in retaliation, and even though he was blurry and kinda a blob, Richie's heart fluttered at the sight. 

"Look man, I've gotta tell you something." 

Eddie frowned. "You ok Rich? You look kinda pale." 

Eddie swam even closer and put the back of his hand on Richie's forehead. Richie flushed, and wriggled away, turning redder by the second. 

"I'm fine, look I just gotta tell you -"

"If this is another 'I fucked your mom' joke I swear to God -" 

"I'm in love with you," Richie blurted out, his heart pounding in his ears. 

Eddie's eyes went wide, and he stared silently at Richie. 

"I mean clearly I love you as a friend, but this isn't a friend way even though I pretended it was when we were kids, fuck I didn't mean to tell you, but yeah I guess you were kinda the way I figured out that I like dick, so congrats, and even though you're gay I'm not saying like I just like dick, or your dick, I mean I love everything about you and -" 

"Richie," he snapped, his heart jumping with adrenaline.

Richie's head snapped up to look at Eddie, and he shrunk back in his seat, trying to appear even a little casual about the conversation even as his heart was stuck in his throat.

"Hmm?" Richie raised his eyebrow, and before he could say anything, Eddie leaned forward and pressed their lips together, abruptly stopping any train of thought in Richie's whirling mind. 

It was just a fraction of a second, barely any time to do anything before Eddie pulled away, but as he pulled away Richie grabbed his wrist and leaned forward again, capturing Eddie's lips and moving with urgency. He couldn't feel his body, just the feeling of Eddie's lips on his, his hand curling around Eddie's wrist while one of Eddie's hands snaked its way into Richie's curls. 

They pressed against each other, oblivious to the others who all gaped at the display, shocked at proclamation. They all had assumptions as kids, and some even as adults, but they didn't really figure it would happen like this. They pawed at each other desperately, all the years of longing and wishing coming to the surface, finally able to be acted upon. 

Mike coughed, and immediately they sprang apart, looking at the others guiltily. Richie glanced at Eddie, and turned bright red again when he saw Eddie's puffed and bitten lips, and his freckles standing out against his pink cheeks. None of them said anything, and then Bill smiled, and they all broke out laughing. 

"Cute, cute, cute," Richie giggled, pinching Eddie's still blushing cheek. Eddie swatted at him as he laughed, trying to get away.

"Don't call me that asshole." 

The others laughed, and suddenly Mike dunked Bill under the water. Bill came up sputtering, but smirked at Mike. 

"Oh I see how it is." 

He darted after Mike, and once again they started a water fight. 

This time, as they were all swimming and twisting away from one another, in their dirty, torn clothes, Richie looked over at Eddie laughing as he tackled Ben, who screamed with delight and dragged Eddie down with him. When Eddie came out of the water he made eye contact with Richie, smiling, and Richie knew that even after the sewers, even after Bowers, and even though they all had some unfinished business in their adult lives outside of this lake and this moment, he knew that he and Eddie would make it out together. 

After all, what better way to find a boyfriend than the guy who hates your jokes, who can't stand your style, who made you gay at eleven, who helped you realize you do anything as long as you're together?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it's taken me so long to get back to this, life has been stressful and i haven't had any motivation  
plus quarantine is messing up my life so i figure if im gonna be up at 4am i might as well be productive
> 
> comments and critique is always appreciated, and lemme know if you guys want anything specific, i need ideas <3 love u nerds


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